Ahh... sigh...

I feel so blessed. Everyday I get up and just thank God for all the many, many blessings he's given to me and my family. I so thankful for the steady job Brian has, the fortunately can provide for our family. I'm so thankful for the wonderful parents and amazing family I have. I know that no matter what, I can always count on them. I'm also so thankful for the friends that I've had for years that I can always count on to be excited for me when good things happen as well as will be sad with me when things aren't going our way...

It's amazing how much having children and learning what real responsiblities can change a person. That isn't to say that all people that have children grow up right away... heck, I know I'm not "grown up," but I can say that having my babies and my husband really puts everthing in perspective. Suddenly, designer purses didn't mean as much to me as having a reliable double stroller. And in moments that I think back at how important I made such material things, I feel a mixture of embarrassment and ignorance... shortly after, I feel proud that I'm able to see the difference.. now.

I am almost thankful for the trials God gives me. Whether it be trying to have the right optimism in a situation, or whether it be waiting on his answers for life changing decisions... I find comfort in knowing that I can always lean on God. I remember, as a child, how distant I felt God was from me. I always believed in "God", but I never felt like I knew him... or like I could talk to him without feeling ashamed of my sins. At this point, I feel like the sooner I point them out to myself and Him, the more comforted I am with the situation I'm in. I'm sure this looks like rambling by this point, but it totally makes sense to me...

Well, I don't really know what the point of my blog was tonight, I was just feeling enlightened on that aspect as I was cleaning and unpacking. Sometimes when I allow my mind to wander so far as to trying to understand God's grace, I get so overwhelmed by His vast-ness I lose all track of what I'm doing and I just can't wrap my mind around His Greatness. He's beyond anything I could imagine or understand... and sometimes I think He's better left as that in my mind than me trying to completely understand... Ahh sigh, I'm going to watch a documentary with Brian then head to bed, so Night! :)