Caleb's Evaluation Results

Yesterday, the day he had his eval, I was too emotional to write a blog detailing it. Yes, I know what my previous blog said. And I hate to say it, but I wasn't as equipped to hear the news I heard as I thought. I KNOW God has a plan for Caleb. I KNOW He is in control. I KNOW that he will answer my prayers... But nothing is harder to hear for a mother than, "Your son is severely delayed and cannot hear correctly."

At the appointment, they did several tests. First, they tested his vision. He has sensory issues, so she wasn't able to complete the tests (because he wouldn't let her touch him, AT ALL.) But from the testing she was able to gather, he has 20/20 vision. She is curious if he is able to bring his eyes together, which he will need to do in order to read.

They then tested his ears. He wasn't comfortable with her testing the vibrations in his ear right off the bat, so he and I went into a sound boothe, where she tested his connection with listening to different speakers and looking at them. He did famously in that test... However, when she was able to "tickle" his ear with a vibration, she was immediately concerned. She showed me on the screen how his left ear is normal. A vibration would travel to his eardrum and come back, making a "peak" line. She then showed me the left ear, which had a dead end. She wrote a referral to his primary to have him check what's causing him not to hear in the ear. She couldn't tell if he couldn't hear at all, if it were impaired, or what the issue was. He sees his pediatrician on Nov. 9th to see what is going on.

Then, they tested his speech/language/fine/gross motor skills. Gross motor skills are right on track. However, he struggled to pass all the other tests... the mod often looked at me and asked me, "is this normal for him?" and for the most part, it was. She was concerned about his fingers not being able to hold the crayon correctly. That he wasn't able to stack blocks, and his speech is very unclear and she doesn't believe his vocabulary is where it should be. Walking out the office, I was so proud of him. He did so well, was very well behaved and all the girls in the office mentioned how beautiful his blue eyes and dimples are. He impressed the mod when he was able to walk down stairs very well, as well as hop on one foot.

It wasn't until I got home, that I began to torture myself with the "what did I do wrongs"... I couldnt help it. I didn't FORGET that God made Caleb in His image. I didn't FORGET that God has a special plan for him... I just, couldn't NOT blame myself for this. I guess it is motherly instinct to want to give everything you have to your children... and when it seems that isn't enough, you begin to question WHY...

However, after crying, accepting, and believing that all this is hopefully a big blessing for my sweet Caleb... I am actually praying he gets into the program so he can have a dedicated and trained team helping him with whatever he needs help with. He goes back Nov. 17th, (the day before my birthday) to have a more in depth evaluation to see if he qualifies for the program.

Heavenly Father,
Thank you for our Caleb. We know that you hear our prayers... and we want to pray that you provide the means neccesary to help Caleb with his hearing, speech, language and motor skills issues. We pray that you lay your mighty hand on Caleb's future... so he may overcome these obstacles on his young age. We know that we are so blessed to have a healthy, HAPPY, little boy, and we have only You to thank for that. We know you made Caleb special, gave him specially to US, and we know you are capable of ALL things, Father. I pray you keep my eyes on You always, to give me perspective and humbling...
In Jesus Christ's Name,
Amen.